Click to Learn How to Catch Him Cheating
Learn the warning signs of a cheating spouse! An exert from my up coming E-Book, THe Ultimate Guide to Catching a Cheater!
We often hear about cheating from other women, telling us why they think their husbands cheated. But what about the guys point of view? It’s a sensitive subject and not all guys want to talk about, nor do they want to tell you the truth to your face. WebMD did a study about why guys cheat, here’s what they had to say.
48% of men rated emotional dissatisfaction as the primary reason they cheated. And we thought maybe the sex was just bad? Nope only 8% of guys cheat due to sexual dissatisfaction. Men are emotional too, even if they don’t show it. They need to feel loved, feel appreciated, told they are helpful and wanted. But men don’t express this need for love and affirmation. So we have to give it to them, don’t wait till they ask for it, they may never ask!
On the plus side 68% of men feel guilt during the affair. A lot of men never thought they would be unfaithful and usually wish they hadn’t. Not all men are heartless. But just because they say they wouldn’t cheat, doesn’t mean they won’t.
77% of cheating men have a good friend who cheated. Sadly by being with this friend, cheating may seem more normal and ok to him. But you can’t tell him not to see this friend, you will only come off as controlling, which will drive him away. What you can do instead is meet happy couples, people who share the same values as you and create a health social network.
40% of cheating men met the other woman at work. Usually at work the person is praised for their efforts, or looked up to, this affirmation comes from someone at work, who might be a woman, and because he feels special and good about himself, he will naturally turn to this person for a relationship. Just another reason to make him feel good at home! WebMD suggests that if he mentions/praises a female co-worker more then he would a male co-worker, it’s time to set boundaries. What would he be comfortable with if it was you and a male co-worker?
Only 12% of cheating men said their mistress was more physically attractive than their wife. So just because that female co-worker or neighbour isn’t better looking to you, does not mean she is not a threat. He is with her because he needs to fill an emotional void. You can fix this by creating a loving and fulfilling environment at home. Working out more, going to the stylist and new sex moves will not fix this, it’s the emotional he needs. But don’t forget sex is very important too, otherwise I wouldn’t have this website.
Only 6% of cheating men had sex with a woman after meeting her that same day or night.
However, 73% of men got to know the other woman for a month or more before they cheated. There may be signs that indicate that this relationship is forming. Try talking to him about your feelings and try to change your attitude, if he wants to be with you, he will change his as well.
Did you know that an emotional affair can be just as bad as a physical affair? All of the above applies to an emotional affair as well. These men are trying to satisfy their emotional needs on a non physical level. Although the emotional affair can also lead to a physical affair.
He cheated, now what?
After you have found out that he has cheated, the choice is yours on what to do. You can leave him or stay with him and try to work it out.
If you try to work it out, you both need to get counselling so you can work out your emotions with some coaching. This way you will both know what is normal and what isn’t. If he doesn’t want to go to counselling or get help, he may be unwilling to change, and you may need to think about leaving him.
But what about the kids?
While a lot of people think it’s better to stay together for the kids, this can be a mistake. Kids are smart, they may know what’s going on. The emotions you feel towards your partner, your kids will pick up on. You aren’t helping them by staying in a dysfunctional relationship. This can actually damage their perception of relationships and how they are supposed to behave in them.